What do you suggest that gay men should do to, so to speak, stay in the game, as they get older? I mean to maximize their attractiveness for dating, sex and so on? Anon.
Well, I'm not exactly a health and beauty consultant, but I'll give it a try.
The very first thing that comes to mind is to try and stay in shape. Yes, I know I've said in the past that big, even obese, guys have their admirers in the gay community, but in general most of these guys are big, tall men with large frames. They may be fat, but they are also husky. I'm not saying that "roly poly" chubby guys don't have admirers -- they do [we call them "chubby chasers"] -- but even they have a certain type of body shape. If you don't fall into either category -- big and husky or roly poly [and in some cases even if you do] it's probably a good idea to keep your weight down. The simple truth is that too much fat in the belly and face makes most men look older and less attractive. While this is not always the case, guys who look younger than their age are generally slender and more fit. [Of course there are younger guys looking for daddybears -- or at least sugar daddies -- who may not care how old you are or how old you look, but at the same time, let's get real ... Younger guys generally want younger guys.]
We're not necessarily talking about joining a gym and playing racquetball, but it's really not that difficult to watch what you eat and get a little exercise. A half hour routine of aerobics three or four times a week can do wonders if you also try not to overdo the fatty, high-calorie foods and rich desserts. This doesn't mean you can't indulge now and then, of course. And walking to the store instead of driving can also burn a lot of calories. Walking is a great exercise. Exercise also helps keep you healthy as you get older.
Then it's a question of taking a good look at yourself and maximizing your assets. If you're balding on top it's probably not a good idea to grow your hair long or affect a -- yuchh -- ponytail. Bald or balding guys should keep the hair short or shave it all off; it just looks better. Long side hair on a guy who's bald on top does not fool anybody into thinking he's younger. As for gray hair, some lucky guys look quite attractive with the "silver fox" look and others just look old: "graybeards." Decide which you are and don't be afraid of a little dye job if it's necessary. But don't overdo it. Senior citizens, for instance, should not have jet black hair as if they were in their twenties. A dye job may not have to look entirely natural [one of the most attractive looks I ever saw on a guy was a gray beard with a dark mustache, which was undoubtedly dyed] but it shouldn't be totally unnatural either.
Just as important as all of these is a positive attitude. If you think of yourself as being "over the hill," everyone else will, too.
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